[ In and Out. Sharon intones over and over in a rhythmic, practiced way. As she does, she moves a little closer and a little closer until she's just feet from him. She can see that he's coming back into himself. His brain is booting back up after a BSoD. ]
Can I hold your hand? [ She asks, holding her own out for him to take if he would like. For her, touch helped when she was in the middle of it. It helped ground her. It made her feel safe. ]
[ The glitching had stopped if only because he'd closed his eyes. Focused. On the breath, on just accepting that he was here and this was what it was... he guessed? No, he'd get there later. Right now, here, there was someone with him. A small nod came as he offered his hand. Patches of it had become leathered and worn but that was slowly seeming to recede.
And little by little, his heart slowed and the tightness around his mask eased up. It wasn't fully gone, and those thoughts still milled about, but one thing he knew was this: he could trust her. ]
[ She holds it tightly, thumb rubbing gently against the leathered patches of flesh. Everything she does is repetitive. Something he can focus on. Something to latch on to. ]
When I had my first panic attack here, I was shoved into a place that reminded me of the horrors I experienced back home. [ She's just talking to fill the space. To give him more to focus on beyond his breathing and the tightness of his chest and heart and skin. ] It was like my brain was working in overdrive. I was so fucking scared and I couldn't get ahold of myself. I tried but I was stuck. Trapped.
Luckily, someone found me. Peter found me. He guided me through it like I just did with you. Made me breathe in and out over and over until I could feel the air in my lungs and my brain was no longer a weird, buzzing mess of fear. [ A pause and she gives the hand she's holding a squeeze. ] I hope I've helped quiet the buzz in your brain.
[ Another pause. Another gentle squeeze. ] And I'm sorry for scaring you.
[ It helps. The predictable movement. Knowing he was here. It was real. Maybe that was part of the anxiety but he still had something, someone, to grab onto. Her voice, steady. Wrench swallowed the dry lump in his throat as he continued to breathe. ]
First time, huh? [ A joke, of course. Though an earnest question at the same time. Everything she described was exactly a panic attack. Had been awhile since he'd had one. Can't say he missed it. Wrench nodded. ] I'm sorry I tried to hit you with my hammer.
[ She responds to his joke with a gentle pinch even as she lets out a huff of laughter from her nose. It took over half a year for her to reach a point where she had a panic attack and it really challenged her. ]
No worries, you missed. [ As if she'd have responded differently if he'd hit her (she wouldn't have, she's joking, too). ] You could really fuck someone up with that, though. It's badass.
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Date: 2023-06-15 06:39 pm (UTC)Can I hold your hand? [ She asks, holding her own out for him to take if he would like. For her, touch helped when she was in the middle of it. It helped ground her. It made her feel safe. ]
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Date: 2023-06-17 01:43 am (UTC)And little by little, his heart slowed and the tightness around his mask eased up. It wasn't fully gone, and those thoughts still milled about, but one thing he knew was this: he could trust her. ]
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Date: 2023-06-17 10:58 pm (UTC)When I had my first panic attack here, I was shoved into a place that reminded me of the horrors I experienced back home. [ She's just talking to fill the space. To give him more to focus on beyond his breathing and the tightness of his chest and heart and skin. ] It was like my brain was working in overdrive. I was so fucking scared and I couldn't get ahold of myself. I tried but I was stuck. Trapped.
Luckily, someone found me. Peter found me. He guided me through it like I just did with you. Made me breathe in and out over and over until I could feel the air in my lungs and my brain was no longer a weird, buzzing mess of fear. [ A pause and she gives the hand she's holding a squeeze. ] I hope I've helped quiet the buzz in your brain.
[ Another pause. Another gentle squeeze. ] And I'm sorry for scaring you.
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Date: 2023-06-29 01:43 am (UTC)First time, huh? [ A joke, of course. Though an earnest question at the same time. Everything she described was exactly a panic attack. Had been awhile since he'd had one. Can't say he missed it. Wrench nodded. ] I'm sorry I tried to hit you with my hammer.
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Date: 2023-07-02 09:59 pm (UTC)No worries, you missed. [ As if she'd have responded differently if he'd hit her (she wouldn't have, she's joking, too). ] You could really fuck someone up with that, though. It's badass.